The Iron Finishing Maiden

My latest creation: The Iron Finishing Maiden. You won’t want to mess with this torture device! What’s the point? When applying stain or topcoating there’s an annoying issue of how to finish the underside of something and let it dry while letting it have access to airflow.


Some of you may have seen ‘painters pyramids’ before; this is based on the same concept. Pyramids work well but not so much with small objects. Here I’ve spaced screws just an inch apart. Surprisingly, this technique of sitting something on top of tiny pinpoints doesn’t leave behind any visible marks when the drying is done.


Incidentally, that’s 440 screws in the board. Good thing I have Radiolab on KQED at night to keep my mind entertained while doing repetitious work.

To minimize the risk of accidentally falling on this monstrosity I added a plywood cover to the pointy side that attaches with with 5/16″ bolts, washers, and wing nuts.


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